“I believe in a universe that doesn’t care and people who do”
are words uttered in the game Night in the Woods that resonated with me but I was unable to relate to. Being queer in an anti-queer community has not allowed me to care for myself or reach out to people around me.
As someone who has not had the opportunity to be abroad, the only exposure to a more accepting community was the available media: a noninteractive distant look at a supportive community. That all changed with my first exposure to virtual exchange. In the midst of the Covid era, participating in the Global Solutions Sustainability Challenge, GSSC, a virtual exchange program, connected two different, yet similar, communities together. Throughout this program, all participants were trained on diversity, equity, and inclusion topics, and developed an inclusive and accessible project. When our two communities met, the first thing one of the community members said was “Hey, guys!” which they apologized for immediately after for using the term “guys.” This was my first exposure to a non-binary person. The support that person received from my local teammates and facilitator was surprising as no one displayed any sort of unsupportive behavior towards them. Our facilitator set up an entire optional session explaining why it's important to not only accept but also support those around us. This acted as a catalyst to a journey of self-acceptance and eventually coming out and speaking out.
My safe space was created because someone else felt safe to share.
After the GSSC experience, that not only provided me with professional skills but also put me on a self-accepting journey, I was eager to further explore these programs and find a lasting safe space. For someone with financial restrictions, virtual exchange was the most convenient source to find these spaces. In each virtual exchange that I participated in, coming out and telling fellow participants became easier; coming out was always after discussing a topic that focused on diversity and inclusion and the way the facilitator conveyed those ideologies. Facilitators, and even participants at times, discussed queer, whether directly or it was simply insinuated, which created room for discussion and freedom to express views, regardless of the response from the participants. As of all the virtual exchange programs that I have participated in, there has been a very supportive queer community within each program across all of Iraq.
One of the spaces where I felt most safe was in the Stevens Initiative’s Alumni Fellowship program, where in a short amount of time, I was able to freely express myself, befriend all the fellows, and have supportive facilitators. To my surprise, sharing my “he/they” pronouns without much introduction or insinuation to my sexual orientation and gender identity was very casual and not discussed among any of the participants, but it did result in multiple participants directly reaching out to me and discuss their sexuality and how they felt much safer discussing it, or at least not worry about hiding it.
This is my narrative and it is a privileged one. Through these virtual exchange programs, I have found multiple safe spaces with queer people and allies, locally and internationally. All because I was lucky enough to know the language the programs were being conducted in. Developing a framework that will actively ensure the inclusion of all parties would be a more sustainable solution to achieve a lasting impact.
As a Kurdish person in Iraq, which is a minority in and of itself, having the privilege of being familiar with the English language, exchange programs become easily accessible without any obstacles. These programs not only created a safe space for me, but they also offered me the opportunity to explore other cultures and their views on queer issues, which has put me on a journey of self-acceptance and an avid human rights advocate. With the English language being a requirement for most of these programs, the opportunity is limited and cannot be accessed by the entire Middle Eastern community, especially queer members in developing countries. This lack of accessibility limits the inclusion and reach of the program goals. With only a select number having this accessibility, not much change will be done within the community.
The required English skills to partake in these programs has limited community members’ exposure to partake in such programs, which allows them to be exposed to other cultures, engage with a supportive community, and experience a transformative and healing journey. Overcoming the language barriers is a hard task with how global the English language is. Developing a framework with more language-inclusive programming will allow for a more sustainable program with a larger impact.
Starting with a virtual national exchange program can pave the way for better impact. Conducting a regional program led by experts and local program alumni can allow for a better reach and influence a larger number of the target groups that don’t experience such programs.
In addition to that, translation services can be provided in the local language to promote programs and their activities within the regions. This will raise awareness towards activities and encourage participants to develop the required skills to engage with said programs.
These programs have played a major part of my self-acceptance journey. They have made me feel safe to come out, advocate for human rights, and create safe spaces. Because of the people who participated in these programs, I was able to sense their compassion and empathy. They made me feel safe. That is something I aim to create to other community members who may not have the privilege to partake in such programs.